The Little World

Beg. Roll over. Die for the Queen.

Good modeller; here’s your trophy. Now go lie on your mat and chew it.

Perhaps it’s not really like that. Maybe the scale modelling contest is an instrument of culture and craftsmanship that rewards excellence and encourages the development of skills and good moral tone.

Perhaps the committee judges are patronising an art and should be praised for their sophistication. After all, where would Michelangelo be if Pope Julius II had not nagged him to finish up – probably still painting the darned ceiling.

The apostates – the sinners – the worms who show their models just for the fun of it and pack them away without a second thought are doomed to be forever excluded from the Hall Of Fame. They have to content themselves with eating regularly and sleeping soundly.