The Little World

This is the way someone asks how much your hobby costs when they want to belittle it. No matter what answer you give, they will scoff at you.

In truth, they don’t want a number as an answer – they just want to fix you while they prepare their next snort. If you like being the butt of abuse, just sit quiet – but if you want some fun, consider the economics of some other pastimes.

Go fishing? You ain’t a’goin’ to do it with a pin on a string, Huckleberry. If you go into BCF or any of the dedicated fishing stores you will spend more in a half hour than you will earn in five. And if you enjoy getting drunk on the back of a stinky boat rolling through the swell out the back of Rottnest trolling for tailor ( note to overseas readers: substitute your local waters and your local fish that you could buy cheaper down the Greek markets ) by all means do so and tear up $ 5 bills and throw them overboard all day.

Car enthusiast? Want to rebuilt a 1937 Ford Ute that you found in a barn? You will find that the car parts store has a machine that moves the decimal points on the price tags to the right – never the left.

Like flying? Why am I even typing a next line?

In short, your scale model building hobby is cheaper and more wholesome than 99.99% of all human activity. I have left the .01% free for marital matters on cold nights. Don’t ask for details.

Note for the fishermen: If you are a professional you go out, get drunk and smelly, and come back with fish. Occasionally you came back dead.

Amateurs go out and get drunk and smelly and don’t come back with anything.

For the record, I prefer to go to a bar to get drunk and smelly. Girls are better than fish.