The Little World

How to defeat the Box Monster.

We all know about the Carpet Monster that eats parts from our model kits before we get a chance to break them. We all have ways of coping with this – mine is crawling about on my hands and knees and swearing.

But what do we do when the Stash Monster starts to overpower us. The beast of 300+ arms that sits in the spare room and laughs at us. The Pit of Styrene. The monster that Tolkien was too afraid to name.

In short, what do you do when your stash is so big that you cannot decide what to do next. You survey it and go away unsatisfied…and this is what the Stash Monster wants: you will go to HobbyHell and buy more kits and the Monster grows…

First off – admit that you have a problem. You are in a hole. Stop digging. Buy paints and tools and whiskey and the attentions of paid women, but do not buy more kits.

Secondly, look at your work area and tidy it up – really. Make it the place where you could do something if you had the energy.

Thirdly, keep the stash separate from the workspace so that you do not see the Monster every time you sit down to build.

Finally, go to the stash and close your eyes. Spin round three times and put your hand out to find the first box that your hand falls upon. Pick it up and take it to your work area and then open your eyes.

Whatever it is, build it. You will have as much fun doing this, and regain whatever mojo will fit in your clothing, by just getting on with it. It is your sole focus for the next fortnight, and you will enjoy doing it even if it causes you to break out in weeping sores.

When done, close your eyes and go back – this time pick a model kit from a different section, but without seeing it. It will seem like a birthday present from a favourite uncle.